Saturday, October 24, 2015

where is the line

We all have a story...A life. What we do or do not do, deep down has a reason stitched to the intertwined network inside of us. Reasons no other may be able to ever grasp. Such could be tied to character, past scars, experiences, habit, lifestyle, foundation, function, distinction , stability, or instability, Faith, action, pride, and God forbid, genetics.

So why? Why judge the fat person in the gym? At least they are there, probably trying to lose weight! Why call the skinny girl anorexic? Maybe she's actually trying to put on weight in muscle! People struggle to gain weight just as people struggle to lose weight. To throw judgements at one another leaves you hasty toward the opposite of what you are (skinny vs. fat or fat vs skinny)

We are called to take care of our bodies. In that calling there is a choice to do it constructively and honorably or we can choose to be destructive and disobedient to how we are supposed to treat ourselves. 

Just recently I came across a story of a school teacher who had posted some bikini pictures on her facebook page and almost lost her job! In fact she may have actually lost her job but I did not read all of the article. She was obviously fit and probably worked hard to get where she is at with her fitness. I agree with modesty but I also think it is a huge fete for some people (especially women) to lose weight and build a toned body that she can love and appreciate. Too often there are women who hate their body (I hate mine most days) is it too tacky to see a woman post progress pictures? Not to say the pictures this particular woman posted were totally modest or totally distasteful but it was enough to jeopardize her job. Where do we as women draw the line? Where do MOST men draw the line when it comes to seeing images of half naked women even if they are "progress" photos? SOME men do NOT draw a line at all. Women are guilty of flaunting it and asking for unneseccary attention. 

Maybe the woman who posted the pics is a good woman, maybe she's married with kids. Maybe she's a mom who overcame postpartum depression through working out and became happy with her body. Maybe she's a recovering alcoholic or drug addict. Maybe she used to be obese. Perhaps she overcame an eating disorder and will inspire millions of young women to do the same. Until we have the facts and reasoning we are in the dark. Who are we to judge such? 

On the other side of the fence our society has openly accepted the sexualization of women in particular. Sex sells. It's everywhere! Thrown in our faces to look good, be sexy, appeal to men, be skinny. Pasted all over social media, the fitness industry, food commercials, and even in hunting magazines! What the hell are we supposed to do. My heart aches for women who think their body is to flaunt. My heart wrenches for my husband and the men in this world who are up against a huge demon when it comes to the sexual images that the world has made ok. I'm terrified for my boys and what they will face with the temptations of pornography, not that it has to go to that extent because half of what they see in the world every day on billboards and magazines at the grocery store  is soft porn. 

As a wife I feel compelled to look good for my husband not only because I'm called to honor him but also to honor my own body by taking care of myself. This can be healthy until the comparison to other women game starts in my head. As wives how do we even begin to compare to what's thrown in our husbands faces as "sexy"? How do we help protect ourselves, our husbands, and our marriages from that poison?

As mothers we need to set the stage for our children on what it means to have beauty, what it means to honor our bodies, and what it means to be a woman. If the example is not set at home then how can we expect them to demonstrate the " right thing " as they grow up? 

A great book that comes to mind as I write all of this is a book called "Captivating" by John and Staci Eldredge. I encourage women and men alike to read this book. It's an insight to why women are the way they are, how to fight th good fight against all of this, how to be a good mother and wife, and to turn to God in order to find our beauty and validation.

If you are a man reading this I encourage you to read "Wild at Heart" by John Eldredge. It sets the stage for what it truly means to be a man. To love beauty but to not find your validation in the woman. 

Most importantly though, we can all learn from God's will and plan for our lives. Through Him we are made whole, beautiful, pure, lovely, and worthy.

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